It’s our 42nd wedding anniversary.
Have you heard of it? My husband took a mistress after seven years of marriage. We had a five year old at that time and I guess real life struggles got the better of him. He has allowed me to mention it because after this fiasco he decided to ‘straighten up and fly right’*.
I wasn’t jealous, at first, although he paid more attention to her than me. She lived in Butler, Georgia. Almost every weekend he drove there to take loving care of her. I knew he was going, but didn’t realize how much attention she needed. She was as young as I was. Surely she didn’t need a lot of reconstruction? Was it a faze? Wouldn’t he realize how much his wife and son needed him at home, especially since he worked during the week, and yet, was spending much of his weekend time with her?
I could tell he was distracted and thinking of her even when he wasn’t in her presence. He would walk out the door on Saturday mornings and be gone all day…loving on her, spending all kinds of money on her, getting her to be the best she could be, and giving her all his undivided attention. He had a hard time, I would think trying to please two women, but it made him happy! Go figure. What about me? What about my needs? What about being gone many weekends from his five-year-old son?
I tried to be sweet about it hoping he would put us first again and stay home. My mother could tell I wasn’t myself. After several weekends of this, she finally said, “Let me take you out to lunch and buy you a new dress.” Believe it or not, that helped.
So, for the next several Saturdays when hubby was out of town, doing who knows what (I didn’t want to think about it), mother and I enjoyed getting out of the house with our girl time. And finally, one Saturday morning as my husband was leaving and looking forward to my new pampering routine by my mother, he was saying goodbye and instead of a soft but sad goodbye, I finally had enough and was disgruntled when I said, “Go. And goodbye!”
Well, something in my voice and words told him he had flown to close to the sun and wasn’t going to get away with it any longer. After all, my mother was taking me out for nice luncheons, helping me care for my son on these outings, and buying gifts for me, which my husband wasn’t around to do. It was really nice.
After that day, he stayed home. He didn’t give up his mistress, but had finished lavishing that much attention on her. He still took care of her, but in a different way, and I was OK with it because he included his family in his next chapter WITH HER.
But my being comfortable with his new adventure was still ‘up in the air’. *
*get the puns?
Here is his mistress that took up so much of his time and attention. At least she is pretty.
