Stupid Is As Stupid Does – Georgia Version, part 2

Stupid Is As Stupid Does …or so says Forrest Gump

 

Fayette News

 

There is a course for college credit entitled, STUPIDITY. Description: What better topic to rail against at college than stupidity? This course examines it at depth from literary, social, and philosophical perspectives. It is offered at Occidental College, a nationally renowned liberal arts college integrating the cultural and intellectual resources of Los Angeles. Oh, that explains it. Even with a course like this, “You can’t fix stupid.”

Last time, previously I wrote about New York and Georgia’s idiotic laws still in the books. Thought you might be interested in a few more that Georgians are to abide by. People have been living in Georgia since it was founded as an English Colony in 1773 and that means there are these laws that potentially date back that far. Even though we may not know the origins of some of these laws, here are a few where you might either get a giggle or realize you are breaking a few without knowing it.

 

  1. It is illegal to keep a donkey in a bathtub. This one breaks my heart. Think of all the donkey lovers out there that might even use these animals as service animals. If they live with them in the house, how else are they going to keep them clean? If they cleaned them outside, they’d get dirty again in no time just walking across the yard toward the house.

 

  1. In Athens-Clarke County, Adult bookstores may not sell alcohol. Wait a minute. Adult bookstores? Where are these adult bookstores? No, really, tell me. But in the meantime, what are the stores worried about with alcohol sales? Like teenagers, these so called “adults”, having a few sips of inhibitors, might hide in the back section of the store and…

 

  1. Also in Athens-Clarke, If you want to read your favorite book in public to your friends, do it before 2:45 AM. Ok, so if you were thrown out of the adult bookstore because your brought your own “inhibitor” you could still buy a book before you leave. However, big brother is watching if you are reading that purchase after 2:45 a.m. anywhere in public with your “friend” who left with you.

 

  1. Athens-Clarke County — Goldfish may not be given away to entice someone to enter a game of bingo. They didn’t say Goldfish crackers, did they? Who doesn’t love those cheesy crackers? Every time I play bridge or bunco, there are bowls of goodies to munch on including goldfish crackers. They need to make this law more clear.

 

  1. Persons under the age of 16 may not play pinball after 11:00 PM in Athens-Clarke County. And yet the pre-teens are the fastest pinball wizards! They aren’t going to bed at 11:00 p.m. anyway. Now they are going to have to go out and find something else keep their adrenaline up after a game of pinball and we were all told nothing good happens after 11:00 p.m. Just let them play! At least we know where they are.

 

  1. If you’re going out of business in Athens-Clarke County, you will need a business license to hold a going-out-of-business sign. How stupid is this? How else will people know you are going out of business? And this county houses students attending the University of Georgia where there are supposedly lots of smart people living there.

 

  1. In Athens-Clarke County it is illegal to sell two beers for the price of one. I doubt anyone in Clarke County is enforcing this one.

 

  1. Owners of mules may not allow their animal to roam around Athens unsupervised. What if they were given a bath outside like the donkeys and got loose? Mules can run as fast as forty miles an hour under certain conditions. These poor mule owners…fined for keeping them in your house or fined for having them outside to break away. Maybe one shouldn’t be a mule owner.

 

Or maybe one shouldn’t live in Athens.